Rainbows for All Children nurtures a community of effective Rainbows-trained facilitators supported with a repository of resources designed to guide youth in their grieving process.

If you have a recommendation of a book, publication, article, tool or resource that should be shared in our resource library, or if you have written or produced materials you would like Rainbows to consider for inclusion, please send your suggestions to us!

To download or print this list please use this link: https://drive.google.com/open?id=12OshDfcQL4f85bV1KBY7NkePY4AVNWWC

Useful Links

Death

• www.childrengrieve.org​
  • "The National Alliance for Grieving Children promotes awareness of the needs of children and teens grieving a death and provides education and resources for anyone who wants to support them."​ - NAGC Mission Statement
• http://www.griefwatch.com
• Grief Watch is a producer of bereavement books and materials. The organization also sponsors support groups in the Portland area for people dealing with various kinds of grief. 

• http://www.centering.org

  ​"The Centering Corporation is a non-profit organization dedicated to providing education and resources for the bereaved. Centering was founded in 1977 by Joy and Dr. Marvin Johnson."

Divorce

• http://www.beadproject.org.uk
  • ​"Our aim is to be a source of information, support and hope for anyone whose loved one has died as a result of drug or alcohol use."
• http://www.fcsok.org/resources/divorce-tips-taking-the-challenge-out-of-blended-families
  • "Family & Children's Services promotes, supports and strengthens the well-being and behavioral health of adults, children and families."
• http://www.kidshealth.org/en/parents/help-child-divorce.html
  • ​Kids Health provides parents with a comprehensive resource guide about divorce.

Deployment

• http://www.roadhomeprogram.org
  • ​Road Home Program provides support services for those facing the challenges of life after deployment. They also provide services for the loved ones of the veteran. 

Trauma

• http://www.acestudy.org 

  • The adverse childhood experiences (ACE) study looked at the impact of early childhood traumas on physical and mental health in adult life.

• http://www.childtrauma.org

  • “We recognize the crucial importance of childhood experience in shaping the health of the individual and ultimately, society. By creating biologically-informed child and family respectful practice, programs, and policy, CTA seeks to help maltreated and traumatized children.”

• http://www.nctsn.org

  • The National Child Traumatic Stress Network provides information about types of trauma children may experience and resources to help children through those traumas.

• http://www.lookthroughtheireyes.org

  • The Illinois Childhood Trauma Coalition provides knowledge and resources to help identify and deal with trauma among children. 

• http://www.acestoohigh.org

  • ACES Too High provides the latest news regarding adverse childhood experiences, including current research being conducted and practices being implemented.

• http://cctasi.northwestern.edu

  • Excellent information and resources including two videos on complex trauma and resilience: http://cctasi.northwestern.edu/resources/complex-trauma

​Books

If purchasing from Amazon, please use this link as there are benefits for Rainbows, Thank You! 

*Note: not all books only fall under the ages listed above. Some books listed with an * can also work for older ages as well.

Sunbeams: Ages 3-5

• General Loss
  • ​The Invisible String by Patrice Karst
• Death​
  • ​Grief is a Mess by Jackie Schuld
    • Learn more about the book here:https://www.jackieschuld.com/grief-is-a-mess
    • Wathc Jackie Schuld read the book here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lFHiy8kqLQU
  • The Goodbye Book by Todd Parr
    • Watch Todd Parr read the book here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e-VnhNSw0l8
  • Sometimes, with ghosts... by Charlyn Wee
    • http://www.sometimeswithghosts.com/
  • ​My Favorite Color is Blue. Sometimes by Roger Hutchison
    • https://www.paracletepress.com/Products/9231/my-favorite-color-is-blue-sometimes.aspx
• Divorce/Family
  • ​The Family Book by Todd Parr
    • https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MIm_H01Z6Ss
  • ​Dinosaurs Divorce by Laurie Krasny Brown and Marc Brown
  • My Family's Changing by Pat Thomas
  • The Huge Bag of Worries by Virginia Ironside
  • It's Not Your Fault, Koko Bear by Viciki Lansky
  • Two Homes by Claire Masurel
• Incarceration
  • What Will Happen to Me: Every Night, Approximately Three Million Children Go To Bed With A Parent In Prison by Howard Zehr
  • What is Jail, Mommy? by Jackie A Stanglin

Rainbows Level 1: Ages 6-8

• General Loss
  • The Invisible String by Patrice Karst
• Death
  • ​How did Nonnie Get to Heaven* by Arlene Michlin Bronstein
    • ​https://honeygood.com/blog/sharing-loss-with-children
  • ​When Aunt Mattie Got Her Wings by Petra Mathers
  • Not the End: A Child's Journey Through Grief by Mari Dombkowski
    • "I wrote Not the End to give hope to children who have experienced the death of a parent. My intention is that loved ones and those working with grieving children will use these pages as a springboard for discussion and a tool for healing. Through this true story, children can see that it is possible to continue to grow, thrive and enjoy life even after the loss of a parent. The hurt they feel at the beginning of grief- that hole in their hearts- will lessen over time as they move forward with their lives." -- Mari Dombkowski
    • http://www.nottheendbook.com/so/0LcqnjkO?cid=de31db30-03bb-4d76-94ef-f71727a7be4d#/main
  • ​My Favorite Color is Blue. Sometimes by Roger Hutchison
    • ​https://www.paracletepress.com/Products/9231/my-favorite-color-is-blue-sometimes.aspx
• ​​Divorce
  • It's Not Your Fault, Koko Bear by Viciki Lansky
  • Two Homes by Claire Masurel
  • I Don't Want to Talk About It by Jeanie Franz Ransom
• Incarceration
  • What Will Happen to Me: Every Night, Approximately Three Million Children Go To Bed With A Parent In Prison by Howard Zehr
  • What is Jail, Mommy? by Jackie A Stanglin
  • My Daddy Is in Jail: Story, Discussion Guide, and SmallGroup Activities for Grades K-5 by Janet M Bender

Rainbows Level 2: Ages 8-10

• General Loss
  • ​The Invisible String by Patrice Karst
• Death
  • ​Comfort for the Grieving Soul by Carolyn Jane Neill
  • The Day Abigail's Fatheres Decided to Live with the Angels: Talking to a Child about Suicide* by Jamie Gallo, M.S., LPC, MBA
  • The Daffodils Still Grow- A Book for Grieving Daughters by Sherri Elizabeth Tidwell 
    • https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N-W_ok28nI4
  • Emily Lost Someone She Loved by Kathleen Fucci
  • If it Were Up to Us by Shannon Everhart Collins
  • My Favorite Color is Blue. Sometimes by Roger Hutchison
    • https://www.paracletepress.com/Products/9231/my-favorite-color-is-blue-sometimes.aspx
• Divorce

  • When My Parents Forgot How to Be Friends by Jennifer Moore-Mallinos

  • What in the World Do You Do When Your Parents Divorce? A Survival Guide for Kids by Kent Winchester and Roberta Beyer

  • I Don't Want to Talk About It by Jeanie Franz Ransom

  • What Can I Do? A Book for Children of Divorce by Danielle Lowry

  • A Smart Girl's Guide to Her Parent's Divorce by Nancy Holyoke

  • Divorce Is Not the End of the World by Zoe and Evan Stern

• Life-Threatening or Chronic Illness
  • The Choice is Mine by Yael Shimoni-Shilo
• Incarceration

  • What Will Happen to Me: Every Night, Approximately Three Million Children Go To Bed With A Parent In Prison by Howard Zehr

  • My Daddy Is in Jail: Story, Discussion Guide, and Small Group Activities for Grades K-5 by Janet M. Bender  

Rainbows Level 3: Ages 10-12

• Death
  • Circa Now* by Amber McRee Turner
    • Twelve-year-old Circe Monroe has a knack for restoring old photographs. It's a skill she learned from her dad, who loves old pictures and putting fun digital twists on them. One day, her father receives a strange phone call requesting an urgent delivery, and he heads out into a storm. The unimaginable happens: a tornado, then a terrible accident, and Circa never sees her dad again. Circa begins to notice something strange about the photos she and her father retouched- the digital flourishes added to the old photos seem to exist in real life.
  • The Distance Between Us: A Memoir by Reyna Grande 
  • My Favorite Color is Blue. Sometimes by Roger Hutchison
    • https://www.paracletepress.com/Products/9231/my-favorite-color-is-blue-sometimes.aspx
• Divorce
  • When My Parents Forgot How to Be Friends​ by Jennifer Moore-Mallinos
  • What in the World Do You Do When Your Parents Divorce? A Survival Guide for Kids by Kent Winchester and Roberta Beyer
  • Cool! by Michael Morpurgo
  • What Can I Do? A Book for Children of Divorce by Danielle Lowry
  • A Smart Girl's Guide to Her Parent's Divorce by Nancy Holyoke
  • Divorce Is Not the End of the World by Zoe and Evan Stern
  • Mom's House, Dad's House for Kids by Isolina Ricci
• Incarceration
  • You Can't Lock Up the Moon Book by Sharyl Green
  • What Will Happen to Me: Every Night, Approximately Three Million Children Go To Bed With A Parent In Prison by Howard Zehr

Rainbows Level 4: Ages 12-14

• Death
  • Healing Your Grieving Heart for Teens: 100 Practical Ideas* by Alan D Wolfelt PhD
    • This book offers different activities for teens to experience, process and mourn death.
  • Weird is Normal When Teenagers Grieve* by Jenny Lee Wheeler, Heidi Horsley PsyD
    • This unique self-help book is written by a grieving teenager who lost her father. She aims to support other grieving teenagers and validate their journey.
  • My Favorite Color is Blue. Sometimes by Roger Hutchison
    • https://www.paracletepress.com/Products/9231/my-favorite-color-is-blue-sometimes.aspx
• Divorce
  • ​Divorce Is Not the End of the World by Zoe and Evan Stern
  • Mom's House, Dad's House for Kids by Isolina Ricci
• Incarceration

  • What Will Happen to Me: Every Night, Approximately Three Million Children Go To Bed With A Parent In Prison by Howard Zehr

  • An Inmate’s Daughter by Jan Walker

  • What Do I Say About That? by Julia Cook  ​

Spectrum Level 1: Ages 14-16

• Death
  • Straight Talk About Death for Teenagers: How to Cope with Losing Someone You Love by Earl A Grollman
    • In this book, the author explains what to expect when you lose someone you love.
  • The Healing Your Grieving Heart Journal for Teens by Alan D Wolfelt PhD
    • This journal works to validate the grieving process for teens and offers nurturing guidance through the darkest times.
• Divorce
  • ​Mom's House, Dad's House for Kids by Isolina Ricci
• Incarceration
  • What Will Happen to Me: Every Night, Approximately Three Million Children Go To Bed With A Parent In Prison by Howard Zehr
  • An Inmate's Daughter by Jan Walker
  • What Do I Say About That? by Julia Cook

Spectrum Level 2: Ages 16-18

• Death
  • You Are Not Alone: Teens Talk About Life After the Loss of a Parent by Lynne Huges
    • This book includes raw and heartfelt testimonials from teens who have lost a parent.
• Incarceration
  • ​What Will Happen to Me: Every Night, Approximately Three Million Children Go To Bed With A Parent In Prison by Howard Zehr

  • An Inmate's Daughter by Jan Walker

  • What Do I Say About That? by Julia Cook

Books for Parents

• General Loss
  • Healing the Hurt, Restoring the Hope by Suzy Yehl Marta
• Death
  • ​Healing the Hurt, Restoring the Hope by Suzy Yehl Marta (Founder of Rainbows for All Children)
• Life-Threatening or Chronic Illness
  • ​The Mother's Promise by Sally Hepmworth
    • ​Alice and her daughter Zoe have been a family of two all their lives. Zoe has always struggled with crippling social anxiety and her mother has been her constant and fierce protector. With no family to speak of, and the identity of Zoe's father shrouded in mystery, their team of two works- until it doesn't. Until Alice gets sick and is given a grim prognosis. Desperate to find stability for Zoe, Alice reaches out to two women who are practically strangers, but who are her only hope: Kate, her oncology nurse, and Sonja, a social worker. As the four of them come together, a chain of events is set into motion and all four of them must confront their sharpest fears and secrets- secrets about abandonment, abuse, estrangement, and the deepest longing for a family. Imbued with heart and humour in even the darkest moments, The Mother's Promise is an unforgettable novel about the power of love and forgivness. 
• Divorce
  • Between Two Worlds: The Inner Lives of Children of Divorce by Elizabeth Marquardt
  • The Truth About Children and Divorce: Dealing with the Emotions so You and Your Children Can Thrive by Robert E. Emery, PhD
  • When Parents Part: How Mothers and Fathers Can Help Their Children Deal with Seperation and Divorce by Penelope Leach 
• Trauma

  • The Boy who was Raised as a Dog: And other stories from a child psychiatrist’s notebook: What Traumatized Children Can Teach Us About Loss, Love, and Healing by Bruce D. Perry, M.D., Ph.D. and Maia Szalavitz​

  • The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma by Bessel van der Kolk, M. D.

  • Trauma Stewardship: an Everyday Guide to Caring for Self While Caring for Others by Laura Van Dernoot Lipsk

• Incarceration

  • All Alone in the World: Children of the Incarcerated by Nell Bernstein

​​

Educational Brochures

Grief and Death

• Caring for Kids After Trauma and Death: A Guide for Parents and Professionals by The Institute for Trauma and Stress at The NYU Child Study Center
  • This in-depth guidebook provides a synthesis of accumulated knowledge and looks at the full range of issues- the need for prevention, attention to critical needs in the midst of the crisisand reasoned research-based intervention over a longer period of time. It is an excellent resource for teachers, mental health providers and all caring adults helping children in times of grief. 
  • http://www.nctsn.org/nctsn_assets/pdfs/Crisis%20Guide%20-%20NYU.pdf
• The Grief Journey of a Child: Helping Children Who Have Lost a Love One- What Kids in Grief Want You to Know by New York Life Foundation
  • This brochure is meant to help you help kids and families who are grieving. In it, you will find an overview of the research and related key findings, kids talking about grief in their own words, a perspective on childhood grief from a leading bereavement expert and some tips and resources for concerned friends of all ages.
• After a Loved One Dies- How Child Grieve and how Parents and Other Adults can Support Them by David J. Schonfeld, MD and Marcia Quackenbusch, MS, MFT, CHES
  • This guide is geared toward parents and family, but others who work with children may also find it useful. Teachers, coaches, childcare providers and other caring adults can offer better support to a child who has lost a loved one when they understand more about how children grieve.
  • English: https://www.aap.org/en-us/advocacy-and-policy/aap-health-initiatives/Children-and-Disasters/Documents/After-a-Loved-One-Dies-English.pdf#search=after%20a%20loved%20one%20dies
  • Spanish: http://www1.newyorklife.com/newyorklife.com/General/FileLink/Static%20Files/Bereavement-bklet-Spanish.pdf
• ​Helping Children Cope with Death by madd Victim Services
  • ​This informational piece talks about the many factors that can impact the grief process, and emphasizes the importance of talking about the deceased. Remembering loved ones and keeping their memory alive is helpful and healing. Many thing's influence children's views on death. Age, religious beliefs, cultural or ethnic values, and their relationship to the deceased person are important factors that affect their understanding. However, the reactions of their caregivers are of primary importance in determining how children will cope with death.
  • http://www.madd.org/victim-services/finding-support/victim-resources/helping-children-cope-with-death.pdf
• ​Words that Help vs Words that Hurt by Children's Grief Education Association
  • ​http://childgrief.org/documents/WordsthatHelpandHurt.pdf

Incarceration

• Broken Bonds: Understanding and Addressing the Needs of Children with Incarcerated Parents by Nancy G. La Vigne Elizabeth Davies Diana Brazzell
  • This article explains how the service community should continue to provide programs to strengthen parent-child relationships that focus on supporting the caregivers, family members, and communities that are affected by parental incarceration.
  • http://www.urban.org/research/publication/broken-bonds-understanding-and-addressing-needs-children-incarcerated-parents

​​Deployment

• Helping Children Cope When a Loved One Is on Military Deployment by Megan Allen and Lynn Staley
  • This article shares strategies that teachers can use to help the children and families of deployed persons who are active military or members of reserve units.
  • https://www.naeyc.org/files/yc/file/200701/BTJAllen.pdf

​​Trauma

• Psychological and Behavioral Impact of Trauma: Preschool Children by the National Child Traumatic Stress Network

  • This brochure gives information about what kinds of traumatic events children might experience and signs and symptoms they may exhibit, depending on their age

  • https://www.ocde.us/HealthyMinds/Documents/Additonal%20Trauma%20Handouts.pdf

​​Educational Videos

Death

• Walking with Grief - Mindy Cassel at Coconut Grove TedX
  • https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NzvEwlhRN4Q
  • Mindy is a licensed psychologist and thanatologist and the co-founder and CEO of the Children's Bereavement Center (CBC). In this very powerful Ted Talk she speaks how community can lead a child towards resilience, wisdom, confidence and hope for a future after death. She mentions the utmost importance of making connectors to those who were lost for children. Whether it be an object from a person who died, a picture or some other memorabilia, she states that during the adjustment process after death it is essential for children to retell their stories of their lost loved one over and over again. Holding onto memories, and talking about those who have died is very helpful and keeps a child afloat as they battle a sea of grief.
• Against Grieving in Silence- Rachel Stephenson
  • https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6zIFGl5tPQQ
  • When loss enters our lives, understanding how to confront it can be difficult. Rachel Stephenson learned a valuable lesson after a difficult loss and shares her wisdom on what it means to grieve meaningfully.
• ​The Grieving Process: Coping with Death
  • https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gsYL4PC0hyk
  • This brief comic explains the grief process and the importance of not enduring it alone.

Complex Trauma

• Remembering Trauma: Connecting the Dots Between Complex Trauma & Misdiagnosis in Youth

  • http://cctasi.northwestern.edu/resources/complex-trauma

  • Remembering Trauma is a short film highlighting the life of a traumatized youth from his early childhood into older adolescence. The film illustrates the impact of complex trauma and the potential for misdiagnosis across various service systems. “Remembering Trauma Part 2” incorporates scenes from the narrative Part 1 film, with poignant commentary from real world professionals who work across child-serving settings, including school, juvenile justice and mental health. 

• Never Give Up: A Video by Youth for Youth

  • http://cctasi.northwestern.edu/resources/complex-trauma

  • This gripping film features a highly diverse cast of seven adolescents and young adults who examine the shared and unique challenges faced, mistakes made, and growth attained in the struggle to transcend legacies of developmental trauma.

Articles

Grief and Death

• http://obituarieshelp.org/words_of_condolences_hub.html
  • This site acts as a guide in finding the perfect words to comfort someone grieving and offer your condolences.

Divorce

• http://health.usnews.com/health-news/health-wellness/articles/2016-01-19/minding-the-kids-in-divorce-minimizing-the-mental-health-impact

  • This article outlines different ways children cope with divorce and ways parents can help their children through the transition.

Trauma

• https://opinionator.blogs.nytimes.com/2014/03/19/first-learn-how-to-calm-down/

  • This article discusses the Head Start Trauma Model, which helps adults learn how to intentionally and effectively respond to children experiencing trauma.

Providers

• Theravive

  • Theravive is an information network connecting people with counselors, psychologists, and therapy clinics in specific areas throughout North America.

  • http://www.theravive.com

• The Widowed Parent

  • The Widowed Parent project is committed to supporting widowed mothers and fathers with children in the home.​
  • https://widowedparent.org/

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